Do we have a Joke Thread here?

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Maine Pilot
Posts: 459
Joined: Fri Oct 05, 2012 7:39 am

Re: Do we have a Joke Thread here?

Post by Maine Pilot »

I just arrived at the airport on a flight from Chicago and there’s a woman passed out on the baggage carousel! The good news - she’s coming around.

My dog ate a whole bag of Scrabble tiles. So, I took him to the vet. No word yet.

I got fired from the calendar factory. Don't know why — all I did was take a day off.

Why did the can crusher quit her job? Because it was soda pressing.
My wife says I only have 2 faults. I don't listen...and something else

Maine Pilot
Posts: 459
Joined: Fri Oct 05, 2012 7:39 am

Re: Do we have a Joke Thread here?

Post by Maine Pilot »

A blind cowboy walks into a bar and asks the bartender if he wants to hear a blonde joke.

The lady next to him at the bar quickly speaks up and says "Well Mr. Blind Cowboy, the bartender has blonde hair and is also our bouncer, the guy on the other side of you has blonde hair and is a pro wrestler, and I'm a 175lb. woman with a black belt in Karate..... now are you sure you still want to tell a blonde joke?"

The blind cowboy thought for a few moments and replied: "Well I guess not....I don't want to spend the rest of the night trying to explain it."
My wife says I only have 2 faults. I don't listen...and something else

Maine Pilot
Posts: 459
Joined: Fri Oct 05, 2012 7:39 am

Re: Do we have a Joke Thread here?

Post by Maine Pilot »

Noah opens up the ark and let all the animals out, announcing to them all to follow God's command and "Go forth, be fruitful and multiply."
He's about to close the great doors of the ark when he notices that there are two snakes sitting in a dark corner and not making a move to leave. So he says to them, "Didn't you hear me? You can go now. Go forth and multiply."
The snakes reply, "That command doesn't apply to us."
Noah shakes his head and asks why.
"We don't," said the snakes, "we're adders."
My wife says I only have 2 faults. I don't listen...and something else

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